Waking Up an Asshole.
I'm not alone in this am I?
Have you ever just woken up pissed?
Like you have absolutely no reason for it at all. You got enough sleep. You had decent enough dreams (that you remember). You woke up naturally. It’s a beautiful day in paradise. But for some reason you’re just raging inside?
The way people look at you makes you angry, the way they talk makes you angry, the way they chew makes you angry, the way they just exist in your general vicinity makes you angry. Is it just me?
I feel like that today. I don’t feel like that often, but right now it feels like often enough to make me even angrier about the very fact that I’m angry.
When I have mood changes like this I never know if it’s normal person mood changes or bipolar mood changes. I’ve only had the diagnosis for a few years and I’m still learning the difference.
But as I’m sitting here typing, I realized that I may have forgotten my morning meds yesterday and I know I didn’t take them the morning before because I had a treatment. Hmm…two days in a row. Could be a problem.
I guess I am learning the difference quicker than I thought because I realized what the problem was. And I’m not angry about it. I’m actually relieved that there is a reason for my foul mood and that I can do something about it.
I’m not really an angry asshole. I just need to take my meds, and a really deep breath.